{"id":988768,"date":"2025-01-10T14:47:04","date_gmt":"2025-01-10T11:47:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/imgazete.com.tr\/ekonomi-haberleri\/?p=988768"},"modified":"2025-01-10T14:47:04","modified_gmt":"2025-01-10T11:47:04","slug":"olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-tanimi-ve-cocuklarindaki-uzun-donem-psikiyatrik-etkileri","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/imgazete\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-tanimi-ve-cocuklarindaki-uzun-donem-psikiyatrik-etkileri\/","title":{"rendered":"Olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f Ebeveyn Tan\u0131m\u0131 ve \u00c7ocuklar\u0131ndaki Uzun D\u00f6nem Psikiyatrik Etkileri"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong><u>DUYGUSAL OLARAK OLGUNLA\u015eMAMI\u015e EBEVEYN \u00d6ZELL\u0130KLER\u0130 NELERD\u0130R?<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Fikirleri sabittir ve tek bir amaca odaklan\u0131rlar.<\/li>\n<li>D\u00fc\u015f\u00fck stres tolerans\u0131na sahiptirler.<\/li>\n<li>En iyi hissettikleri \u015feyi yaparlar.<\/li>\n<li>\u00d6zneldir, nesnel de\u011fildirler.<\/li>\n<li>Farkl\u0131l\u0131klara \u00e7ok az sayg\u0131 g\u00f6sterirler.<\/li>\n<li>Benmerkezcidirler, bencildirler.<\/li>\n<li>\u0130lgi oda\u011f\u0131 olmay\u0131 severler.<\/li>\n<li>Rol de\u011fi\u015fimini te\u015fvik ederler.<\/li>\n<li>Empati becerileri d\u00fc\u015f\u00fckt\u00fcr.<\/li>\n<li>\u0130nsanlar\u0131 kendilerine \u00e7eker ve insanlar yard\u0131m etmek istediklerinde onlar\u0131 iterler.<\/li>\n<li>\u0130stedikleri h\u0131zl\u0131 bir \u015fekilde tahmin edilmezse \u00e7abucak \u00f6fkelenirler.<\/li>\n<li>\u0130htiya\u00e7 duyduklar\u0131 \u015feyi konu\u015fmak yerine herkesi huzursuz edecek bir tahmin oyunu yarat\u0131rlar.<\/li>\n<li>Ge\u00e7mi\u015f eylemleri ve gelecekteki sonu\u00e7lar i\u00e7in sorumluluk almaya direnirler.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong><u>NEDEN BU KADAR \u00c7OK DUYGUSAL A\u00c7IDAN OLGUNLA\u015eMAMI\u015e EBEVEYN VAR?<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Ara\u015ft\u0131rmalara ve yazarlar\u0131n klinik prati\u011fine g\u00f6re olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f ebeveyn \u00e7ocuklar\u0131\u00a0<strong><em>anne veya babalar\u0131n\u0131n \u00e7ocukluklar\u0131nda\/erken ya\u015flarda b\u00fcy\u00fck mutsuzluklar\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>veya<strong><em>\u00a0s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131lar ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>ifade etmi\u015ftir. Buradan yola \u00e7\u0131karak ge\u00e7mi\u015fte ya\u015fan\u0131lan \u00e7ocukluk travmalar\u0131n\u0131n gelecek ku\u015faklara yans\u0131mas\u0131 tahmin edece\u011finiz gibi\u00a0<strong>her nesilde daha dramatik bir \u015fekilde artmaktad\u0131r.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong><u><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-8529 alignleft b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-2.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 301px) 100vw, 301px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-2.jpg 301w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-2-150x150.jpg 150w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-2-100x100.jpg 100w\" alt=\"\" width=\"301\" height=\"301\" \/>DUYGU FOB\u0130S\u0130 VE DUYGUSAL BULA\u015eMA KAVRAMLARI<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Duygusal olarak olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f bir\u00e7ok insan \u00e7ocukluklar\u0131nda belli duygular\u0131 ifade ettikleri zaman aile gelene\u011fini utan\u00e7 verici bir \u015fekilde ihlal edeceklerini \u00f6\u011frenerek b\u00fcy\u00fcmektedir. B\u00f6ylece\u00a0<strong><em>duygular\u0131n\u0131 ifade etmenin hatta denemenin utan\u00e7 ve ceza getirece\u011fini \u00f6\u011frenirler<\/em><\/strong>. Bu durum\u00a0<strong>DUYGU FOB\u0130S\u0130\u00a0<\/strong>olarak adland\u0131r\u0131labilir.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright wp-image-8528 b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-3.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 226px) 100vw, 226px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-3.jpg 276w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-3-217x300.jpg 217w\" alt=\"\" width=\"226\" height=\"313\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Duygusal olarak olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f insanlar\u00a0<strong>DUYGUSAL BULA\u015eMA\u00a0<\/strong>olarak adland\u0131r\u0131lan bir ileti\u015fim metodu kullan\u0131rlar. Kendi duygular\u0131 hakk\u0131nda pek az bilince sahip olmalar\u0131 nedeniyle\u00a0<strong><em>duygusal gereksinimlerini konu\u015fmak yerine d\u0131\u015fa vururlar.\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>Hissettikleri bu \u015feyi\u00a0<em>ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131n da hissetmesini sa\u011flarlar.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Asl\u0131nda daha net anlamam\u0131z i\u00e7in;\u00a0<strong><em>duygusal bula\u015fma bebek ve k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n kendini ifade etme \u015feklidir.\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>Bak\u0131c\u0131lar\u0131 neyin yanl\u0131\u015f oldu\u011funu anlay\u0131p d\u00fczeltene kadar durmadan a\u011flarlar. Bu da bak\u0131c\u0131y\u0131 \u00e7ocu\u011fu sakinle\u015ftirmek i\u00e7in gerekli olan \u015feyleri yapmaya te\u015fvik eder.<\/p>\n<p>Duygusal olarak olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f ebeveyn ger\u00e7ekle ba\u015fa \u00e7\u0131kmak yerine \u00e7arp\u0131tarak\u00a0<em>uygunsuz savunma mekanizmalar\u0131\u00a0<\/em>geli\u015ftirir. \u00c7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131 kendilerini daha iyi hissetmek i\u00e7in kullan\u0131rlar. Bu durum\u00a0<strong>ebeveyn \u2013 \u00e7ocuk rollerinin de\u011fi\u015fimi<\/strong>ne neden olur.<\/p>\n<p><strong><u>DUYGUSAL OLARAK OLGUNLA\u015eMAMI\u015e EBEVEYNLER\u0130N D\u00d6RT T\u00dcR\u00dc<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-8526 b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-5.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"227\" height=\"228\" \/><strong>1)\u00a0<u>DUYGUSAL<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>D\u00f6rt t\u00fcr i\u00e7inde\u00a0<strong>en \u00e7ocuksu\u00a0<\/strong>oland\u0131r.<\/li>\n<li>Duygusal a\u00e7\u0131dan\u00a0<strong>ciddi gelgitlere sahiptir<\/strong>\u00a0ve bu f\u0131rt\u0131nalar esnas\u0131nda\u00a0<strong>\u00e7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131n da ayn\u0131 duygular\u0131 deneyimlemesini bekler<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>S\u0131kl\u0131kla\u00a0<strong>psikiyatrik bozukluklar\u00a0<\/strong>e\u015flik eder (psikotik boz., bipolar boz., narsistik ki\u015filik boz. vb.).<\/li>\n<li>Stres ve duygusal uyar\u0131lmaya\u00a0<strong>tahamm\u00fcl etmede zorlan\u0131r<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Aile ya\u015fam\u0131\u00a0<strong>bu ebeveynin ruh haline g\u00f6re \u015fekillenir<\/strong>.<\/li>\n<li>Bu t\u00fcr\u00a0<strong>ebeveynlerin \u00e7ocuklar\u0131 di\u011fer insanlar\u0131n isteklerine boyun e\u011fmeyi \u00f6\u011frenir<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-8525 b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/01\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-6.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 227px) 100vw, 227px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/01\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-6.jpg 327w, https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/01\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-6-300x253.jpg 300w\" alt=\"\" width=\"227\" height=\"192\" \/><strong>2)\u00a0<u>HIRSLI<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>En normal g\u00f6r\u00fcnen<\/strong>, \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131n hayat\u0131 i\u00e7in\u00a0<strong>en fazla yat\u0131r\u0131m yapan\u00a0<\/strong>ebeveyn tipidir.<\/li>\n<li>\u00c7eli\u015fkili bi\u00e7imde bu ebeveynlerin\u00a0<strong>\u00e7ocuklar\u0131 genellikle demotive ve depresif\u00a0<\/strong>duygudurumuna sahiptir.<\/li>\n<li>Yapt\u0131klar\u0131 her \u015feyin\u00a0<strong>di\u011fer insanlar\u0131n be\u011fenmesini ve de\u011fer vermesini istemekte<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Her \u015feyin yolunda oldu\u011funu ve t\u00fcm cevaplar\u0131 bildiklerini kabul ettiklerinden\u00a0<strong>kendilerinden bilin\u00e7li olarak \u015f\u00fcphe etmezler.<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Genellikle\u00a0<strong>duygusal a\u00e7\u0131dan yoksun bir ortamda b\u00fcy\u00fcm\u00fc\u015fler<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>\u00c7ocuklar\u0131na\u00a0<strong>s\u00fcrekli de\u011ferlendirildi\u011fini hissettirir<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>S\u00fcrekli kontrol ve m\u00fcdahale etmelerine ba\u011fl\u0131\u00a0<strong>bu t\u00fcr ebeveynlerin \u00e7ocuklar\u0131 herhangi bi \u015feyi yaparken devaml\u0131 bir yeti\u015fkinin yard\u0131m\u0131na ihtiya\u00e7 duyarlar.<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-8524 b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-7.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 229px) 100vw, 229px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-7.jpg 280w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-7-208x300.jpg 208w\" alt=\"\" width=\"229\" height=\"331\" \/><strong>3)\u00a0<u>PAS\u0130F<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u0130\u015fler yo\u011fun bir hal almaya ba\u015flad\u0131k\u00e7a\u00a0<strong>pasifle\u015fir ve duygusal a\u00e7\u0131dan kendilerini geri \u00e7eker<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>\u00c7ocuklar\u0131na\u00a0<strong>bir s\u0131n\u0131r koymaz veya rehberlik etmez<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>\u00c7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131\u00a0<strong>sevebilir ama yard\u0131m edemez<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Uysal ve e\u011flenceli yanlar\u0131 onlar\u0131 di\u011fer \u00fc\u00e7 ebeveyn t\u00fcr\u00fcne g\u00f6re\u00a0<strong>daha sevecen\u00a0<\/strong>hale getirir.<\/li>\n<li>\u00c7ocuklar\u00a0<strong>ebeveyninin orada ger\u00e7ekten kendileri i\u00e7in var olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 bilir<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Bir yeti\u015fkin olarak \u00e7ocuklar\u0131yla sadece e\u011flenceli vakit ge\u00e7irmek de\u011fil ayn\u0131 zamanda\u00a0<strong>onlar\u0131 korumalar\u0131 gerekti\u011fine dair bir misyon edinmez<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>\u0130\u015fler zorla\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131nda \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131\u00a0<strong>y\u00fcz \u00fcst\u00fc b\u0131rakmak<\/strong>la birlikte e\u011fer daha mutlu bir hayat\u0131 elde etme \u015fanslar\u0131 varsa\u00a0<strong>t\u00fcm aileyi terk edebilir<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Pasif ebeveyni seven bir\u00a0<strong>\u00e7ocuk ileride insanlar\u0131n terk edi\u015flerine bahaneler bulan yeti\u015fkinlere d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr.<\/strong>\u00a0Pasif ebeveynin ger\u00e7ekten \u00e7aresiz oldu\u011funa kendini inand\u0131rabilir. \u00c7ocuklar sevdi\u011fi ebeveynin davran\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131 zihninde olumluya \u00e7evirebilir.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-8523 b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-8.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 158px) 100vw, 158px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-8.jpg 268w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-8-214x300.jpg 214w\" alt=\"\" width=\"158\" height=\"221\" \/><strong>4)\u00a0<u>REDDED\u0130C\u0130<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Etraflar\u0131 sanki\u00a0<strong>duvarla \u00e7evrili<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>\u00c7ocuklar e\u011fer\u00a0<strong>ortada olmazlarsa ebeveyninin \u00e7ok daha iyi hissedece\u011fi hissine sahip<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Bir kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131k vermeleri beklendi\u011finde ya\u00a0<strong>k\u0131zarlar<\/strong>\u00a0ya da\u00a0<strong>k\u00f6t\u00fc bir s\u00f6z s\u00f6yler<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>D\u00f6rt t\u00fcr i\u00e7inde\u00a0<strong>en az empatik\u00a0<\/strong>oland\u0131r.<\/li>\n<li>Aile hayat\u0131n\u0131\u00a0<strong>kendi istekleri do\u011frultusunda \u015fekillendirirler<\/strong>.<\/li>\n<li>Reddedici ebeveyn\u00a0<strong>\u00e7ocuklar\u0131 kendilerini ba\u015f belas\u0131 ve rahats\u0131z edici olarak g\u00f6rebilir<\/strong>.<\/li>\n<li>Reddedilen \u00e7ocuklar bir yeti\u015fkin olarak\u00a0<strong>ihtiya\u00e7 duyduklar\u0131 \u015feyi istemekte zorlan\u0131r<\/strong>.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong><u><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-8522 b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-9.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 234px) 100vw, 234px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-9.jpg 341w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-9-285x300.jpg 285w\" alt=\"\" width=\"234\" height=\"246\" \/>\u00c7OCUKLAR DUYGUSAL YALNIZLIKLA NASIL BA\u015eA \u00c7IKAR?<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>\u00d6ncelikle \u015funu bilmeliyiz ki\u00a0<strong>ba\u015fa \u00e7\u0131kma tarzlar\u0131n\u0131n hi\u00e7biri bir \u00e7ocu\u011fun kendi potansiyelini tamamen ger\u00e7ekle\u015ftirmesine izin vermez.<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131n gereksinimlerine \u00f6ncelik vermeyi<\/strong>\u00a0bir ili\u015fkide\u00a0<strong>kabul edilmenin bir bedeli\u00a0<\/strong>olarak \u00f6\u011frenebilir.<\/li>\n<li>Ki\u015filere\u00a0<strong>yard\u0131m etme rol\u00fc<\/strong>n\u00fc \u00fcstlenebilir.<\/li>\n<li>Herkesi\u00a0<strong>kendi duygusal gereksinimlerinin az oldu\u011funa ikna edebilir<\/strong>.<\/li>\n<li>Her ne kadar \u015fu anki ili\u015fkilerinde\u00a0<strong>duygusal gereksinimleri kar\u015f\u0131lansa da\u00a0<\/strong>\u00e7ocukluk d\u00f6neminde ya\u015fanan\u00a0<strong>yaln\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131n kal\u0131c\u0131 travmas\u0131\u00a0<\/strong>endi\u015fe, depresyon ya da k\u00f6t\u00fc r\u00fcyalar arac\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131yla\u00a0<strong>onlar\u0131 rahats\u0131z edebilir.<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong><u><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-8521 b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-10.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 356px) 100vw, 356px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-10.jpg 387w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-10-300x231.jpg 300w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-10-260x200.jpg 260w\" alt=\"\" width=\"356\" height=\"274\" \/>ROL-BENL\u0130K GEL\u0130\u015e\u0130M\u0130<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Aileniz \u00e7ocuklu\u011funuzda\u00a0<strong>ger\u00e7ek benli\u011finize yeterince kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131k vermezse\u00a0<\/strong>ba\u011flant\u0131 kurmak i\u00e7in ne yapman\u0131z gerekti\u011fini bulmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rs\u0131n\u0131z.\u00a0<strong>Oldu\u011funuz gibi olmak yerine bilin\u00e7siz olarak bir rol-benlik (sahte-benlik) geli\u015ftirirsiniz<\/strong>. Asl\u0131nda bu durum size\u00a0<em>aile sisteminde g\u00fcvenli bir yerinizin olmas\u0131n\u0131 sa\u011flar<\/em>. Bu\u00a0<strong>rol-benlik yava\u015f yava\u015f ger\u00e7ek benli\u011fin do\u011fal ifadesinin yerini al\u0131r<\/strong>. Rol-benlik iki farkl\u0131 duruma evrilebilir:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u00abBen o kadar fedakar biri olaca\u011f\u0131m ki herkes beni sevecek, takdir edecek.\u00bb<\/li>\n<li>\u00ab\u00d6yle ya da b\u00f6yle (iyi veya k\u00f6t\u00fc) insanlar\u0131n beni fark etmesini sa\u011flayaca\u011f\u0131m.\u00bb<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong><u>OLGUNLA\u015eMAMI\u015e EBEVEYNLE BA\u015e ETME YOLU<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>\u00c7ocuklar duygusal yoksunlukla ba\u015fa \u00e7\u0131kmak i\u00e7in iki yola sahiptirler:\u00a0<strong>\u0130\u00e7selle\u015ftirmek<\/strong>\u00a0veya\u00a0<strong>D\u0131\u015fsalla\u015ft\u0131rmak<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p><strong><u>\u0130\u00c7SELLE\u015eT\u0130R\u0130C\u0130LER<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Zihinsel olarak\u00a0<strong>aktif<\/strong>tir, bir \u015feyler\u00a0<strong>\u00f6\u011frenmeyi sever<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>Hassas<\/strong>\u00a0bir yap\u0131lar\u0131 vard\u0131r ve hayata dair\u00a0<strong>sebep sonu\u00e7 ili\u015fkisi<\/strong>ni anlamaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rlar.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Daha fazla \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131klar\u0131nda daha iyisini yapacaklar\u0131<\/strong>na inan\u0131rlar.<\/li>\n<li>Problemleri kendi ba\u015flar\u0131na \u00e7\u00f6zmek i\u00e7in\u00a0<strong>i\u00e7g\u00fcd\u00fcsel olarak sorumluluk al\u0131r<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Endi\u015fe duymalar\u0131n\u0131n ba\u015fl\u0131ca sebebi\u00a0<strong>ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131 k\u0131zd\u0131rd\u0131klar\u0131nda kendilerini su\u00e7lu hissetme<\/strong>leri ve sahtekar olarak g\u00f6r\u00fcnmekten korkmalar\u0131d\u0131r.<\/li>\n<li>Bir ili\u015fkideki en b\u00fcy\u00fck kay\u0131plar\u0131\u00a0<strong>fazlas\u0131yla fedakar<\/strong>\u00a0olmalar\u0131d\u0131r.<\/li>\n<li>Ba\u011f kurman\u0131n bedeli\u00a0<strong>ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131 hayatlar\u0131ndaki ilk s\u0131raya koymak<\/strong>\u00a0ve onlara \u00e7ok \u00f6nemlilermi\u015f gibi davranmak oldu\u011funa inan\u0131r.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Yard\u0131m isterken\u00a0<\/strong>(terapi dahil) kendilerini\u00a0<strong>mahcup\u00a0<\/strong>hissederler, bunu hak etmediklerini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrler.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Sorunlar\u0131n\u0131 kendi ba\u015flar\u0131na \u00e7\u00f6zme<\/strong>ye \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131r, yard\u0131m istemeye utan\u0131rlar.<\/li>\n<li>Kendilerini bir ba\u015f belas\u0131 olarak hissetmekten nefret ederler. Bu durum onlar\u0131n kolayl\u0131kla\u00a0<strong>ihmal edilmelerine neden olur.<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>\u0130\u00e7selle\u015ftiriciler\u00a0<strong>fazlas\u0131yla ba\u011f\u0131ms\u0131z\u00a0<\/strong>olur:<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-8520 b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-11.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 230px) 100vw, 230px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-11.jpg 257w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-11-200x300.jpg 200w\" alt=\"\" width=\"230\" height=\"345\" \/><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>\u00abKendi ba\u015f\u0131ma halledemeyece\u011fim hi\u00e7bir \u015fey yok, kimseye g\u00fcvenmek istemiyorum. Kimsenin zorland\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6rmesine izin verme.\u00bb<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>Aile ortam\u0131\u00a0<\/strong>duygusal olarak\u00a0<strong>tats\u0131z oldu\u011funda\u00a0<\/strong>i\u00e7selle\u015ftirici \u00e7ocuklar karamsar aile\u00a0<strong>ortam\u0131n\u0131 mutlu bir hale getirmek i\u00e7in\u00a0<em>ne\u015feli bir role\u00a0<\/em>b\u00fcr\u00fcnebilir.\u00a0<\/strong>Hatta \u00f6yle ki bu i\u015f\u00a0<strong>ebeveynine ebeveynlik yapma<\/strong>ya kadar gidebilir.<\/p>\n<p>\u0130\u00e7selle\u015ftiriciler\u00a0<strong>bilin\u00e7alt\u0131nda bir ki\u015finin\u00a0<em>kendini ihmal etmesinin\u00a0<\/em>iyi bir insan oldu\u011funu g\u00f6sterdi\u011fine inanabilir<\/strong>. Fedakarl\u0131kta bulunman\u0131n en de\u011ferli \u00fclk\u00fc oldu\u011fu \u00f6\u011fretildi\u011finden\u00a0<strong>yeti\u015fkinlikle<\/strong>\u00a0bu \u00e7ocuklar kendi ihtiya\u00e7lar\u0131 ve ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131n ihtiya\u00e7lar\u0131 aras\u0131nda\u00a0<strong>sa\u011fl\u0131kl\u0131 bir duygusal dengeyi nas\u0131l kuraca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 bilemez<\/strong>ler.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>\u0130yile\u015ftirici fanteziler\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>kurarlar, de\u011fi\u015fimi istemeyen insanlar\u0131 de\u011fi\u015ftirmeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015fabilirler.\u00a0<strong>Kurtar\u0131c\u0131 rol benli\u011fi<\/strong>ni \u00fcstlenmeye meyillidirler.<\/p>\n<p><strong><u>DI\u015eSALLA\u015eTIRICILAR<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Tepkisel<\/strong>\u00a0davran\u0131rlar ve endi\u015felerini hemen bast\u0131rmak i\u00e7in d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmeden hareket ederler.<\/li>\n<li>Kendi i\u00e7lerine pek d\u00f6nmediklerinden kendi eylemlerinden ziyade ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131 ve ko\u015fullar\u0131\u00a0<strong>su\u00e7lama e\u011filimi<\/strong>\u00a0g\u00f6sterirler.<\/li>\n<li>Hayat\u0131 deneme yan\u0131lma s\u00fcreci olarak g\u00f6r\u00fcrler ama genellikle\u00a0<strong>hatalar\u0131ndan ders \u00e7\u0131karmaz<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>Mutlu olmak i\u00e7in d\u0131\u015f d\u00fcnyada bir \u015feylerin de\u011fi\u015fmesi\u00a0<\/strong>gerekti\u011fi d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncesine s\u0131k\u0131ca ba\u011fl\u0131d\u0131rlar.<\/li>\n<li>Kendi benlikleri ile ilgili ya\u00a0<strong>\u00e7ok d\u00fc\u015f\u00fck \u00f6zg\u00fcvene<\/strong>\u00a0sahip olurlar ya da\u00a0<strong>\u015fi\u015firilmi\u015f bir kendini be\u011fenmi\u015flik<\/strong>\u00a0hali ya\u015farlar.<\/li>\n<li>Ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131 ili\u015fkiler, madde ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131 veya\u00a0<strong>hemen memnuniyet hissi sa\u011flayan farkl\u0131 \u015feylere bel ba\u011flar<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>Endi\u015fe<\/strong>\u00a0duymalar\u0131ndaki as\u0131l neden\u00a0<strong>g\u00fcven duyduklar\u0131 d\u0131\u015fsal kaynaklar\u0131n kesilecek olmas\u0131<\/strong>d\u0131r.<\/li>\n<li>Ya\u015fad\u0131klar\u0131\u00a0<strong>en b\u00fcy\u00fck sorun\u00a0<\/strong>d\u00fcrt\u00fcsel davranan insanlar\u0131n cazibesine kap\u0131lmalar\u0131 ve destek i\u00e7in ba\u015fkalar\u0131na\u00a0<strong>ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131<\/strong>\u00a0hale gelmeleridir.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-8519 b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-12.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 248px) 100vw, 248px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-12.jpg 302w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-12-252x300.jpg 252w\" alt=\"\" width=\"248\" height=\"295\" \/>Ba\u015f etme yollar\u0131ndan\u00a0<strong>hangisinin daha k\u00f6t\u00fc oldu\u011funu ay\u0131rt etmek zor<\/strong>dur.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u0130\u00e7selle\u015ftiriciler hep ac\u0131 \u00e7ekerler ve s\u00fcrekli kendilerini su\u00e7lama e\u011filimindedirler.<\/li>\n<li>D\u0131\u015fsalla\u015ft\u0131r\u0131c\u0131lar ise genellikle ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131 k\u0131zd\u0131ran veya \u00e7ileden \u00e7\u0131karan davran\u0131\u015flar sergilerler, kendilerine yard\u0131m edebilecek birini bulana kadar rahats\u0131zl\u0131k vermeye devam ederler.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>\u00abDuygusal olarak olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f ebeveynler d\u0131\u015fsalla\u015ft\u0131r\u0131c\u0131d\u0131r.\u00bb<\/p>\n<p><strong>Il\u0131ml\u0131 d\u0131\u015fsalla\u015ft\u0131r\u0131c\u0131lar\u00a0<\/strong>ya\u015flar\u0131 ilerledik\u00e7e\u00a0<strong>geli\u015fime a\u00e7\u0131k\u00a0<\/strong>olabilir ve kendi\u00a0<strong>i\u00e7lerine d\u00f6nmeye ba\u015flayabilir<\/strong>.\u00a0<strong>Do\u011fru ko\u015fullar alt\u0131nda her bir stil faydal\u0131<\/strong>\u00a0olabilir. Buradaki\u00a0<em>ana\u00a0<strong>problem<\/strong>\u00a0her iki durumdan birine\u00a0<strong>a\u015f\u0131r\u0131 saplan\u0131nca<\/strong>\u00a0ortaya \u00e7\u0131kmaktad\u0131r.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong><u><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-8518 b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-13.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 202px) 100vw, 202px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-13.jpg 291w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-13-200x300.jpg 200w\" alt=\"\" width=\"202\" height=\"303\" \/>\u00d6Z-BENL\u0130K<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><strong>\u00d6z<\/strong>\u00a0benlik,\u00a0<strong>ger\u00e7ek<\/strong>\u00a0benlik,\u00a0<strong>do\u011fru<\/strong>\u00a0benlik,\u00a0<strong>temel<\/strong>\u00a0benlik vb. pek \u00e7ok isimle an\u0131labilir.<\/p>\n<p>Bir insan\u0131n\u00a0<strong>varl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n merkezinde ger\u00e7e\u011fi s\u00f6yleyen bilin\u00e7\u00a0<\/strong>olarak ifade edilebilir. \u0130\u00e7selle\u015ftiriciler \u00f6z benliklerini susturup yerine bir rol-benlik bi\u00e7erek ebeveynin sevgisini kazanmak i\u00e7in bir yol buldu\u011funu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong><u>\u00abUYANMAK \u0130\u00c7\u0130N YIKILMAK GEREK\u0130R\u00bb<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>\u0130nsanlar\u00a0<strong>rol benlikleri ve iyile\u015ftirici fantezileri faydadan \u00e7ok zarar verdi\u011finde y\u0131k\u0131lmaya ba\u015flar<\/strong>. \u00c7\u00f6k\u00fc\u015fe ge\u00e7ti\u011fimizde buna\u00a0<strong>neyin sebep oldu\u011fu<\/strong>nu sormam\u0131z gerekir. \u0130lk ba\u015fta \u00e7o\u011fu insan bu duruma kendi benli\u011finin neden oldu\u011funu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr. Ancak asl\u0131nda\u00a0<strong>duygusal ger\u00e7ekleri inkar etme \u00e7abas\u0131<\/strong>\u00a0bu \u00e7\u00f6k\u00fc\u015fe neden olur.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-8517 b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/01\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-14.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 237px) 100vw, 237px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/01\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-14.jpg 313w, https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/01\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-14-240x300.jpg 240w\" alt=\"\" width=\"237\" height=\"296\" \/>Baz\u0131 insanlar\u0131n ki\u015filikleri bu duygusal \u00e7alkant\u0131dan sonra\u00a0<u>geli\u015firken<\/u>\u00a0baz\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6nceki halinden de\u00a0<u>daha geriye gitti\u011fi\u00a0<\/u>fark edilmi\u015ftir. \u00d6zellikle\u00a0<strong>olumsuz duygular\u0131n sebep oldu\u011fu huzursuzluk, h\u0131rsl\u0131 insanlar\u0131\u00a0<\/strong>\u00e7\u00f6z\u00fcm bulmak i\u00e7in\u00a0<strong>motive eder.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>\u00abA\u00e7\u0131k olmay\u0131 sa\u011flayan \u015fey duygular\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 ba\u015fkas\u0131na s\u00f6ylemek de\u011fildir, ger\u00e7ekten ne hissetti\u011finizi bilmektir.\u00bb<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-8516 alignright b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-15.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 237px) 100vw, 237px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-15.jpg 237w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-15-201x300.jpg 201w\" alt=\"\" width=\"237\" height=\"353\" \/>\u00abAsla vazge\u00e7me!\u00bb<\/p>\n<p>\u00abElinden gelenin en iyisini yap!\u00bb<\/p>\n<p>\u00abT\u00fcm yollar\u0131 dene!\u00bb<\/p>\n<p>gibi s\u00f6ylemler motivasyonu \u00e7ok y\u00fcksek bir insan i\u00e7in\u00a0<strong>zihnin zehiri\u00a0<\/strong>olabilir.<\/p>\n<p>Her zaman elinden gelenin en iyisini yapmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmak gereksiz bir yorgunluktur. Mant\u0131kl\u0131 olan elinden gelenin\u00a0<strong>en iyisini ne zaman yap\u0131p ne zaman yapmayaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 bilmek<\/strong>tir.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Ebeveyninin zay\u0131f yanlar\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6rmek\u00a0<\/strong>bir\u00a0<strong>\u00e7ocuk i\u00e7in<\/strong>\u00a0utan\u00e7 verici hatta\u00a0<strong>korkun\u00e7tur<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>Uyan\u0131lmas\u0131 en zor fantezilerden biri ebeveynlerimizin bizden daha ak\u0131ll\u0131 ve daha \u00e7ok bildi\u011fi inanc\u0131d\u0131r.<\/p>\n<p><strong><u>DUYGUSAL OLARAK OLGUNLA\u015eMAMI\u015e EBEVEYN A\u011eINDAN NASIL KURTULUNUR?<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>T\u00fcm anne babalar \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131 sever.<\/li>\n<li>Ailen g\u00fcvenebilece\u011fin tek varl\u0131\u011f\u0131nd\u0131r.<\/li>\n<li>Ailen her zaman senin i\u00e7in oradad\u0131r.<\/li>\n<li>Ailen senden daha fazlas\u0131n\u0131 bilir.<\/li>\n<li>Ailen ne yaparsa yaps\u0131n senin iyili\u011fin i\u00e7in yapar.<\/li>\n<li>Ailen ne olursa olsun seni sevecektir.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>E\u011fer ebeveyninizden biri duygusal olarak\u00a0<strong>olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015fsa yukar\u0131da bahsedilen ifadelerin \u00e7o\u011fu do\u011fru olmayabilir<\/strong>. \u00d6ncelikle bunun fark\u0131na vararak \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fcm i\u00e7in ilerlememiz gerekir.<\/p>\n<p>Olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f ebeveynlerin\u00a0<strong>\u00e7ocuklar\u0131ndaki genel fantezi ebeveynin kalbinin de\u011fi\u015fece\u011fi<\/strong>\u00a0ve sonunda ilgi g\u00f6sterip\u00a0<strong>onlar\u0131 sevece\u011fi yan\u0131lg\u0131s\u0131d\u0131r<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>Bu yan\u0131lg\u0131dan kurtulup beklentileri de\u011fi\u015ftirerek duygusal olarak olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f ebeveynle\u00a0<strong>nas\u0131l ba\u015fa \u00e7\u0131kaca\u011f\u0131m\u0131z<\/strong>\u0131 \u00f6\u011frenebiliriz. Burada\u00a0<strong>\u00fc\u00e7 yakla\u015f\u0131m \u00f6nemli<\/strong>dir:<\/p>\n<p><strong>1) Mesafeli g\u00f6zlem<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>2) Olgunluk fark\u0131ndal\u0131\u011f\u0131<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>3) Eski rol-benli\u011finden uzak durmak<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Duygusal \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fcz\u00fc kazanman\u0131n ilk ad\u0131m\u0131\u00a0<u>ebeveyninizin duygusal y\u00f6nden olgunla\u015f\u0131p olgunla\u015fmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 iyi de\u011ferlendirmek<\/u>tir. Rol-benli\u011finizden s\u0131yr\u0131l\u0131p ger\u00e7ek benli\u011finize d\u00f6nd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fczde ailenizin sevgisini kazanamayabilirsiniz\u00a0<strong><em>ama kendinizi kurtarabilirsiniz.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong><u><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-8515 b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-16.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 344px) 100vw, 344px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-16.jpg 344w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-16-239x300.jpg 239w\" alt=\"\" width=\"344\" height=\"432\" \/>MESAFEL\u0130 G\u00d6ZLEM VE G\u00d6ZLEMSEL OLMAK<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Ger\u00e7ek ileti\u015fim ve yak\u0131nl\u0131k<\/strong>, bahsi ge\u00e7en olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f ebeveyn ailelerinde\u00a0<strong>yok<\/strong>tur. Bu t\u00fcr ailelerde\u00a0<strong>ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131l\u0131k ve rol yapmak aileyi bir arada tutmak<\/strong>\u00a0i\u00e7in de\u011ferli g\u00f6r\u00fcl\u00fcr. Kimsenin ger\u00e7ek benli\u011fi asla bilinmez. Bu t\u00fcr ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131 ailelerde biriyle sorun ya\u015f\u0131yorsan\u0131z o ki\u015fiyle konu\u015fmak yerine\u00a0<em>ba\u015fka bir ki\u015fiyle konu\u015fursunuz<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>\u0130nsanlar\u00a0<strong>mesafeli bir bi\u00e7imde g\u00f6zlem\u00a0<\/strong>yapmaya devam ettik\u00e7e di\u011fer insanlar\u0131n davran\u0131\u015flar\u0131ndan incinmez ve duygusal tuzaklar\u0131na d\u00fc\u015fmezler.<\/p>\n<p>Duygusal olarak olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f insanlarla ileti\u015fim kurarken\u00a0<strong>duygusal tepkiler vermek yerine sakin kal\u0131r<\/strong>\u00a0ve belirli bir perspektiften bakarsan\u0131z kendinizi\u00a0<strong>daha kontroll\u00fc<\/strong>\u00a0hissedebilirsiniz (yava\u015f\u00e7a nefesinizi sayabilir, huzur verici herhangi bir \u015feyi o an i\u00e7in hayal edebilirsiniz).<\/p>\n<p>E\u011fer olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f\u00a0<strong>ebeveyni g\u00f6zlemlerken \u00fcz\u00fcnt\u00fc hissediyorsan\u0131z\u00a0<\/strong>bu durum\u00a0<strong>iyile\u015ftirici fantezilerinizin hala aktif\u00a0<\/strong>oldu\u011funu g\u00f6sterir.<\/p>\n<p>Mesafeli g\u00f6zlem ve g\u00f6zlemsel olmay\u0131 kavrad\u0131ktan sonra uygulama k\u0131sm\u0131nda\u00a0<strong>e\u011fer hala olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f ebeveyn sizinle kendi istedi\u011fi t\u00fcrden bir ileti\u015fim kuruyorsa\u00a0<\/strong>aran\u0131za\u00a0<strong>mesafe koymak i\u00e7in bir bahane<\/strong>\u00a0bulabilirsiniz.\u00a0<strong>G\u00f6zlemsel olmak\u00a0<\/strong>fark etti\u011finiz gibi pasif de\u011fil aksine\u00a0<strong>olduk\u00e7a aktif bir s\u00fcre\u00e7tir<\/strong>. Duygusal ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131l\u0131ktan uzak durman\u0131n asil bir yoludur.<\/p>\n<p><strong><u>OLGUNLA\u015eMA FARKINDALI\u011eI<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Bu fark\u0131ndal\u0131k di\u011fer\u00a0<strong>insanlar\u0131n olgunluklar\u0131n\u0131 hesaba katarak ac\u0131 verici ili\u015fkilerden kurtulup<\/strong>\u00a0duygusal \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fc\u011fe ula\u015fman\u0131z\u0131 sa\u011flayacakt\u0131r.\u00a0 Duygusal a\u00e7\u0131dan olgunla\u015fmad\u0131\u011f\u0131na karar verdi\u011finiz biriyle\u00a0<strong>ileti\u015fim kurman\u0131n \u00fc\u00e7 yolu\u00a0<\/strong>bulunmaktad\u0131r;<\/p>\n<p>1)\u00a0<u>\u0130fade etmek ve ak\u0131\u015f\u0131na b\u0131rakmak:\u00a0<\/u>Kar\u015f\u0131n\u0131zdaki\u00a0<strong>ki\u015finin sizi duymas\u0131n\u0131 ya da de\u011fi\u015fmesini beklemeyin<\/strong>. \u00d6nemli olan kendi duygu ve d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerinizi sakin ve net bir \u015fekilde ifade etmi\u015f olman\u0131zd\u0131r.\u00a0<strong>A\u00e7\u0131k ve samimi bir ili\u015fki kurdu\u011funuz i\u00e7in kendinizi rahat hissetmeniz ba\u015far\u0131labilir bir ama\u00e7t\u0131r.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>2)\u00a0<u>\u0130li\u015fkiye de\u011fil sonuca odaklanmak:\u00a0<\/u>Bu etkile\u015fimde di\u011fer\u00a0<strong>ki\u015fiden ne bekledi\u011finizi kendinize sorun<\/strong>. Dinlemesini mi, anlamas\u0131n\u0131 m\u0131, pi\u015fman olmas\u0131n\u0131 m\u0131, \u00f6z\u00fcr dilemesini mi; neyi bekliyorsunuz? \u0130li\u015fkiye de\u011fil sonuca odaklan\u0131n, ili\u015fkiye odaklanmak duygusal anlamda etkile\u015fim kurman\u0131za neden olur ve olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f bireylerin sizi kontrol etmesi ve bast\u0131rmas\u0131yla sonu\u00e7lan\u0131r.<\/p>\n<p>3)\u00a0<u>\u0130lgilenmek yerine y\u00f6netmek:\u00a0<\/u>Duygusal olarak\u00a0<strong>olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f insanlar\u0131n ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131n \u0131srarlar\u0131na kar\u015f\u0131 koyma gibi bir stratejileri yok<\/strong>tur.\u00a0<strong>Ayn\u0131 soruyu sormaya devam\u00a0<\/strong>ederseniz sapt\u0131rma ya da ka\u00e7\u0131nma giri\u015fimleri eninde sonunda bo\u015fa \u00e7\u0131kacakt\u0131r.<\/p>\n<p><strong><u>\u00dc\u00c7 C\u00dcMLE ASLA UNUTULMAMALI<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Anne baban\u0131za\u00a0<strong>size verdikleri her \u015fey i\u00e7in sayg\u0131 duyabilirsiniz<\/strong>\u00a0ama\u00a0<strong>insanlar\u0131n zay\u0131f y\u00f6nleri yokmu\u015f gibi davranmak zorunda de\u011filsiniz.<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>\u0130nsan olarak iyi olman\u0131z bir ili\u015fkiye ne kadar de\u011fer verece\u011finize dayanmamaktad\u0131r ve\u00a0<strong>insanlarla aran\u0131za s\u0131n\u0131r koymak bencillik de\u011fil<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Her ne kadar m\u00fckemmelli\u011fi bekleyen a\u015f\u0131r\u0131 derecede ele\u015ftirel bir i\u00e7 ses nedeniyle\u00a0<strong>kendinizi reddetmeyi \u00f6\u011frenseniz de<\/strong>\u00a0ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131n tepkilerini \u00f6nemsemeden\u00a0<strong>ger\u00e7ek benli\u011finizi, duygu ve d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerinizi geri alabilirsiniz<\/strong>.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong><u><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-8514 b-loaded\" src=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-17.jpg\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 278px) 100vw, 278px\" srcset=\"https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-17.jpg 278w, https:\/\/hekimcebakis.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/olgunlasmamis-ebeveyn-17-240x300.jpg 240w\" alt=\"\" width=\"278\" height=\"347\" \/>DUYGUSAL OLARAK OLGUN \u0130NSANLAR NASIL TANIMLANIR?<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Ger\u00e7ekci<\/strong>\u00a0ve\u00a0<strong>g\u00fcvenilir<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Sorunlar\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcrler ve a\u015f\u0131r\u0131 tepkiler vermek yerine\u00a0<strong>sadece sorunlar\u0131 gidermeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131r<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Hem hisseder hem de d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrler, bu sayede\u00a0<strong>duygusal olarak \u00fczg\u00fcn olsalar bile mant\u0131kl\u0131<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>Tutarl\u0131d\u0131r<\/strong>, bu onlar\u0131 g\u00fcvenebilece\u011finiz ki\u015filer haline getirir.<\/li>\n<li>Her \u015feyi\u00a0<strong>ki\u015fisel alg\u0131lamaz<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Hem kendilerine hem de zay\u0131f y\u00f6nlerine\u00a0<strong>g\u00fclmeyi bilir<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>M\u00fckemmelliyet\u00e7i de\u011fil<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Sizin\u00a0<strong>bireyselli\u011finize sayg\u0131\u00a0<\/strong>g\u00f6sterirler.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Ald\u0131klar\u0131ndan daha fazlas\u0131n\u0131 vermeye istekli\u00a0<\/strong>olurlar ama\u00a0<strong>dengesizli\u011fin s\u00fcresiz devam etmesine de g\u00f6z yummaz<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>Size kat\u0131lmayabilirler ancak sizin\u00a0<strong>bak\u0131\u015f a\u00e7\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 anlamaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131r<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>D\u00fcr\u00fcstt\u00fcr<\/strong>, \u00f6z\u00fcr diler ve gerekirse telafi eder.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Fark edildi\u011finizi size hissettirir<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>Onlar\u0131n etraf\u0131nda olmak keyif verir<\/strong>.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Bir s\u00f6z ile yaz\u0131m\u0131 sonland\u0131rmak istiyorum, umar\u0131m okurken i\u00e7inizde yol a\u00e7t\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u201cacaba\u201d duygusu sizlere \u0131\u015f\u0131k olmu\u015ftur;<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><strong>\u00abI\u015f\u0131k b\u00f6yle bir \u015feydir, sadece g\u00f6rmek istediklerinizi de\u011fil her \u015feyi ayd\u0131nlat\u0131r.\u00bb<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong><u>\u0130LER\u0130 OKUMALAR VE KAYNAK\u00c7A<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f Ebeveynlerin Yeti\u015fkin \u00c7ocuklar\u0131 \/\u00a0<\/strong>Yazar: Lindsay C. Gibson, \u00c7evirmen: Dilek Boyraz, Yay\u0131nevi: Sola Unitas<\/li>\n<li><strong>Olgunla\u015fmam\u0131\u015f Ebeveynlerin A\u00e7t\u0131\u011f\u0131 Yaralar\u0131 \u0130yile\u015ftirmek \/\u00a0<\/strong>Yazar: Lindsay C. Gibson, \u00c7evirmen: Dilek Boyraz, Yay\u0131nevi: Sola Unitas<\/li>\n<li><strong>\u00c7ocuklukta \u0130hmalin \u0130zi: Bo\u015fluk Hissi \/\u00a0<\/strong>Yazar: Jonice Webb, \u00c7evirmen: G\u00fcls\u00fcn Ar\u0131kan, Yay\u0131nevi: Sola Unitas<\/li>\n<li><strong>\u00c7ocuklukta \u0130hmalin \u0130zi: \u00c7\u00f6z\u00fcmler \/\u00a0<\/strong>Yazar: Jonice Webb, \u00c7evirmen: G\u00fcls\u00fcn Ar\u0131kan, Yay\u0131nevi: Sola Unitas<\/li>\n<li><strong>Seninle Ba\u015flamad\u0131 \/<\/strong>\u00a0Yazar: Mark Wolynn, \u00c7evirmen: Mine Madeno\u011flu, Yay\u0131nevi: Sola Unitas<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u0130NT. DR. \u0130LAYDA \u00d6ZDEN<br \/>\nhttps:\/\/hekimcebakis.org Web sitesinde yay\u0131nlanm\u0131\u015f olan al\u0131nt\u0131lanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>DUYGUSAL OLARAK OLGUNLA\u015eMAMI\u015e EBEVEYN \u00d6ZELL\u0130KLER\u0130 NELERD\u0130R? Fikirleri sabittir ve tek bir amaca odaklan\u0131rlar. D\u00fc\u015f\u00fck stres tolerans\u0131na sahiptirler. En iyi hissettikleri \u015feyi yaparlar. \u00d6zneldir, nesnel de\u011fildirler. Farkl\u0131l\u0131klara \u00e7ok az sayg\u0131 g\u00f6sterirler. Benmerkezcidirler, bencildirler. \u0130lgi oda\u011f\u0131 olmay\u0131 severler. Rol de\u011fi\u015fimini te\u015fvik ederler. Empati becerileri d\u00fc\u015f\u00fckt\u00fcr. \u0130nsanlar\u0131 kendilerine \u00e7eker ve insanlar yard\u0131m etmek istediklerinde onlar\u0131 iterler. \u0130stedikleri h\u0131zl\u0131 [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":988769,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[4390,4391,4392,4393,4394,4395,4396,4397,4398,4399,4400,4401,4402,4403],"class_list":["post-988768","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-imgazete","tag-1-duygusal","tag-2-hirsli","tag-3-pasif","tag-4-reddedici","tag-cocuklar-duygusal-yalnizlikla-nasil-basa-cikar","tag-dissallastirmak","tag-duygu-fobisi","tag-duygusal-bulasma","tag-duygusal-olarak-olgunlasmamis-ebeveynlerin-dort-turu","tag-icsellestirmek","tag-olgunlasmamis-ebeveynle-bas-etme-yolu","tag-oz-benlik","tag-rol-benlik-gelisimi","tag-uyanmak-icin-yikilmak-gerekir"],"amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/988768","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=988768"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/988768\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/988769"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=988768"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=988768"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/imgazete.tr\/yalova-cinarcik\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=988768"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}